Poop: Mothers and Pastors

In chatting with a friend, I signed off by telling her we probably both should head back to our vocations.  I am a pastor and right now she is a stay-at-home mom.  In leaving, I suggested to her that her vocation was likely more important than mine.  She wrote this:

“Either way, it’s leading the church – I just have the mini-kind. And the poop I deal with is the physical variety.”

This friend has always has had a way with words, but this short exchange she sent my mind sprinting in two directions.

First, I was happy to hear her understanding that mothering (and we could include fathering also) ultimately is of great consequence to the future of the Church. When so many women seek to influence the Church by seeking offices in the church not given to them, this friend rightly understands that her God given role as mother is a great opportunity to influence the Church.  I do not mean to suggest that she or any other woman has no other influence in the church, but I do mean to point out that way too many women are ignorant of or dismiss the awesome possibilities of Christian mothering.

Secondly, her second line was not only clever but spot on.  Every vocation has its inherent “poop.”  And yet the vocations of motherhood and pastoring are two where the ones called to these offices are often pressured into denying such things.  Among mothers, there seems to be a constant pressure to give the impression that all is well and smiles are broad at home.   But that is not always true.  While changing a diaper is a holy work, it does not make it any less smelly or more pleasant.  And while my friend noted the physical variety of “poop” she encounters, there is much more “poop” experienced by mothers seeking to train up their children.  And it is well that we all be honest about that.

Pastors also seem to be encouraged to speak of the ministry only in positive ways.  And some pastors do just this.  Get around a seminary recruiter and you will well think the job is “poop” free and just a constant joy.  I enjoyed listening to a recent episode of God Whisperers as Bill Cwirla and Craig Donofrio reflected on some of the “poop” of the public ministry.  They were slow to recommend an emailer jump right in to the office unaware of such things.  It reminded me of how my dad sometimes used to suggest to me doing something other than pastoring.  He  knew the “poop” well and sought to protect his son from such things.  However, I suppose had I done something else, I would have only found different “poop” to endure.  But he of course was right in admitting that the ministry is not just a stroll through the daisies.  I must make clear, the “poop” of the ministry does not make the work any less holy.  And there is much joy in this work as well.  I am fully convinced this is what I am to do.  But anyone who thinks being God’s spokesman will make for a constantly easy life has never spent much time pondering the life of the apostles, prophets, or Jesus.

So today I say “Hoorah!” for mothers but encourage them to be honest about the reality of the task with each other.  And I say “Hoorah!” for pastoring and yet admit that sometime it stinks like a dirty diaper.  Either way we are leading the church, and dealing with “poop” of many varieties.